For all the women who feel that it isn't worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage,

Men are like....

Laxatives They irritate the crap out of you.
Bananas The older they get, the less firm they are.
Weather Nothing can be done to change them.
Blenders You need one, but you're not quite sure why.
Chocolate Bars Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips.
Commercials You can't believe a word they say.
Department Stores Their clothes are always 1/2 off.
Government Bonds They take soooooooo long to mature.
Mascara They usually run at the first sign of emotion.
Popcorn They satisfy you, but only for a little while.
Snowstorms You never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.
Lava Lamps Fun to look at, but not very bright.
Parking Spots All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped.